Defining transphobia

This is a really interesting statement posted by BuffytheReasonableFeminist on a Mumsnet thread in chat on what is the difference between the theory of gender is the Trans community and the political difference with feminism*:

“I want to be accepted as a woman, because that is what I am.”

“But ‘women’ to me is an oppressive stereotype that I want to challenge”

“I don’t want you to challenge it, because it I want it to stay how it is. It is my identity.”

“It’s my identity too and I don’t want you to define it for me.”

It’s a pretty good summation of the discussion on what constitutes transphobia from representatives of all forms of feminism, a transwoman, women who aren’t feminist (and one misogynist dick being a misogynist dick).