Oh, Misogyny, How I have missed thee!

I genuinely don’t know how I get out of bed in the morning without you to control my thoughts and actions. Today, I learned that the only appropriate “revenge” against a husband for cheating on you is to win an Oscar for best actress and for writing! 

Had I not seen this amazing article in the Telegraph this morning about Kenneth Branagh’s inability to control where he puts his penis, I would have had no idea that it was déclassé for women to speak publicly about their hurt and anger at the man they married being a dickhead.

I would never have known that women expressing their own feelings constituted “revenge”. I would never have known that “revenge” was something only men get to do. That women were never ever entitled to speak publicly about their anger or hurt; that women aren’t allowed to feel angry or hurt at their husband being a dickhead.

So, thank you Telegraph for telling all women that the ONLY way to respond to your husband’s infidelity is to keep quiet about it for 20 years and win yourself 2 Oscars. 

Thank you, once again, for pointing out that men can do whatever they want without consequence, but a woman speaking about anything is evidence she’s a bitch.

Thank you for telling women that their feelings are irrelevant.

Thank you for telling men that it’s justifiable for them to kill their wife if she has an affair.

Thank you for telling women that they aren’t allowed to comment whatsoever on their husband’s affair because it’s mean and pathetic. Who knew that Jennifer Aniston and Jo Wood were just giant cry-babies for objecting to their husband’s affairs?

Misogyny, I don’t know how I manage to get through my life thinking that men are responsible for where they put their penises. 

After all, I don’t see the Telegraph suggesting that Branagh’s behaviour was at fault here.

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