#DickheadDextox: Richard Brittain for VAWG

Richard Brittain drScreen Shot 2015-11-11 at 16.26.25ove 500 miles from London to Scotland to assault a teenage girl, Paige Rolland, who posted a negative review of a draft of his book online. He tracked Rolland to her job and proceeded to break a bottle of wine over her head.

This is not the first time Brittain has engaged in male violence against women and girls. In fact, the book Brittain wrote was part of the sustained harassment and stalking of a woman, which included traveling to Scotland to ‘ask if the woman he was in love with wanted to pretend to be kidnapped to share their love with the world and sell his book. Brittain pled guilty to “engaging in a course of conduct which caused Miss Durant fear or alarm by repeatedly pursuing her, approaching her, following her and publishing a story about stalking her in September 2014.” One month later, Brittain assault Rolland.

He detailed his criminal behaviour in a post entitled The Benevolent Stalker.* Having been called out on his CRIMINAL behaviour, Brittain took a stalking “seminar” and came to this conclusion:

Over the last few weeks, I have learnt a lot. In various corners of the web, my blog post The Benevolent Stalker was discussed. One thing that struck me is how many girls claim to have had stalkers; often multiple. I therefore believe that this could be a problem verging on endemic, particularly when considered in the context of a general vibe. There seems to be less trust between genders than ever. We’ve seen videos of women walking down the street and being harassed, and the misogyny of Julien Blanc and Dapper Laughs. In my view, the latter is not necessarily misogynistic but a rather desperate and unfunny comedian who played a caricature which we were supposed to laugh at for its outrageous offensiveness. But misogyny is no laughing matter, and more troubling is that such personality types are common enough for this brand of ‘humour’ to work.

He certainly showed a lack of awareness. I, too, have shown a lack of awareness; for the person I stalked, for myself, and for the nature of stalking. As it appears to be a fairly common problem, I feel that more education might be needed.

I don’t know who ran the seminar, but they need to work on their training and perhaps not use ‘seminars’ to work with perpetrators. Possibly his therapist needs some training as well because this doesn’t make me think Brittain gives a shit about anyone but himself.

I want to use my experience, of having been a stalker, to help others from going down that dark route. Here are some warning signs which I would look out for:

a) You find that you’re comparing yourself to characters in fiction. For example, I frequently compared myself to Han Solo and her to Princess Leia. Sometimes, I even had the music of Star Wars running through my head.

b) There was a strong, impulsive feeling that I had to act in order to keep the love alive. It could well be that this biological process was useful when we were cavemen, but it is of fundamental importance that we overcome such carnality in today’s society. I’m not talking about lust, by the way. This was something very different, much more powerful, a feeling which took hold of all my thoughts and emotions.

c) My psychiatrist said that I showed an ‘erotomanic’ quality. Erotomania is a type of delusion in which you believe that someone is in love with you. You believe that she/he is declaring her/his affection through special glances, signals and hidden messages. In my case, I looked at her Twitter and believed that many tweets were directed at me.

d) When the person rejects you, you manage to convince yourself that it is part of a challenge or game. Or that she is only denying you because she wants to keep it as a forbidden love, hidden from the rest of the world.

If you are showing any of the above symptoms, it is possible that you are in danger of becoming a stalker. I would advise you to take a step back and re-evaluate.

When I first heard this story, I assumed Brittain would get only a slap on the wrist for his assault despite the stalking. Having read parts of his blog, I’m now worried he will still only get a slap on the wrist even though he has stalked and harassed two women, assaulted one woman and has repeatedly harassed and behaved in an abusive manner to anyone who spoke negatively about his book. I’m worried he will step up his abusive behaviour and continue targeting women.

Brittain’s blog seems to suggest he has self-diagnosed with narcissistic personally disorder and paranoid schizophrenia. It also says a psychiatrist has prescribed him anti-psychotics. Whatever the truth, Brittain shows a long history of extremely problematic and criminal behaviour.

 

*clean link via Do Not Link

Charlie Sheen: Still a misogynistic dickhead shocker

Charlie Sheen, misogynist extraordinaire, who spent Father’s Day tweeting vile abuse at his ex-wife Denise Richards, including this charming poem, is still one of the most popular sitcom actors in Hollywood. This is the War on Women

“open letter to
the
media:
Denise Richards
is a shake down
piece of shit doosh phace
&
worst mom alive!
a despicable charlatan who
sux ISIs
ass!!!!
(and cock)
fuk it

I’m out
©

I have paid that
Klay-Vinnik leaky diaper
over 30 Mil
and she calls me
a DbD!

see u in
court you evil
terrorist sack of landfill rash

bitch couldn’t act
hot in a fire
or
wet in a pool

you should all
hear her acting lessons:
sounds like
dolphins sucking off
Coyotes!!!

this gangster
Sheenius will be
Winning!
Duh!!
really grandma?
I’m the
ARCHITECT OF THE TERM YOU LEAKY AND MALARIA
RIDDLED
PUDDLE OF SHIT STINK DECAY!!

and now I’m
out

last note;
this lab rat
is from a retarded
shit hole named
“Downers Grove”

nothing further your Honor

hash tag
go fuk Sambora some more
you
“Dood thief”

that genius called
me 1000 times to ask
“how can I get the
ass funk to be less,
ass-funky”

the only answer I had
was
to tell him to
“steep” that hedgehog
in bleach…”
twice a day

for a year
fukker whore

and hey Irv;

go fuk yourself pussy
bitch

I am the truth
you are my enemy

try me

I dubble dare ya
skinny boy face

Sir © of the Sheen
is
on
stand by

 

#DickheadDetox: Owen Jones for Whining about not winning feminism

 

To be fair, there are lots of reasons why Owen Jones could be nominated for the #DickheadDetox : his recent inability to understand that lesbians are human too followed by his excruciating refusal to recognise that watching pornography at work isn’t acceptable for anyone, including middle aged white dudes – or, that a judge who claims to be so stressed they need to wank at work shouldn’t be a judge. I’ve yet to see A&E staff argue for their right to wank at work due to ‘stress’, but, hey, they usually aren’t middle aged white dudes.

I’ve added Jones for whining about not ‘winning’ feminism in response to challenges from anti-pornography feminists. Cus, there is no evidence of male entitlement in a dude who insists on ‘winning’ an argument with women. None whatsoever.

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Screen Shot 2015-04-02 at 09.26.00

Owen Jones is just another misogynistic, left-wing right-on dudebro.

#DickheadDetox: Pharrell Williams for refusing to listen

Because he’s apparently the dude who wrote most of Blurred Lines – a song he’s allowed Robin Thicke to get most of the credit – and backlash for. And, despite hundreds of thousands of women explaining why they found it triggering, he’s decided it’s totes ok because he wrote the song from a “good place”. <pardon me whilst I vomit>

So, Williams gets on the list until he’s actually listened to the advice from every Rape Crisis centre on the freaking planet and realises that his Girl Power talk means fuck all unless he starts taking responsibility for the consequences of his actions.

From the Independent:

The chorus – “I know you want it” – was that T.I.’s part too?

“No, I wrote that. But what’s wrong with that? I know I want it!”

Some commentators have called it a “bit a rape-y”.

“Mmm. Well they have some creepy friends. Because, by the way, when did I say it meant sex?”

It’s heavily inplied.

“When did I say anything about sex?”

We go round the houses a bit. Finally Pharrell says: “You have to make sure that you’re coming from a decent place. And I was coming from a decent place. Because when you look at the song in totality you realise that the song’s about a woman who wanted to… who felt something, but decided to take it out on the dancefloor. I’d never want to say anything about sex. Like, ‘rape-y’ would mean, ‘I’m gonna do this to you, you know you want me to do that to you…’”

#DickheadDetox : The Entire Cast of the Expendables 3

I knew about Mel Gibson’s history of misogyny and racism. Hell, who hasn’t heard the video tape of Gibson shouting racist vitriol at a police officer several years ago.  I had absolutely no idea that most of the male main cast of the Expendables have histories of domestic violence.  – not until I read Kate Harding’s article in Dame Magazine:

The Expendables 3, featuring Mel Gibson, is currently in theaters. The successful movie franchise has also starred Mickey Rourke, who was charged with spousal abuse in 1994; Wesley Snipes, who allegedly beat one of his girlfriends until she was mostly deaf in one ear; Sylvester Stallone, whose late half-sister accused him of abuse; Stone Cold Steve Austin, accused more than once of assaulting an intimate partner; Eric Roberts, ditto; Jean-Claude Van Damme, whose third wife charged him with spousal abuse; and Arnold Schwarzenegger, who, as governor of California, repeatedly blocked spending on domestic-violence programs and shelters. Just in case you were tempted to think of Gibson as some kind of anomaly.

As Harding says, it doesn’t matter what they’ve done. We will ignore it and keep celebrating these “great” men.

Ray Rice, Domestic Violence and the Importance of Specialist Refuge Services

American footballer Ray Rice has been fired from the Baltimore Ravens following gossip-site TMZ’s release of the video of Rice punching his then partner (now wife) Janay Palmer unconscious and dragging her from the lift of a hotel by the hair. This “altercation”, as the media then labelled it, was covered by mainstream press with photographic stills from the CCTV in the hotel. Yet, in the 24 hours since TMZ has released the full footage of the assault, the media and a number of pundits have chosen to proclaim their total surprise at just how violent the assault committed by Rice was. And, people are watching the video as if its part of the WWE Saturday night showcase.

Let’s be very clear here: Rice was arrested directly after the incident. It was very clear in the media reports that Palmer was punched so hard as to render her unconscious and then she dragged from the lift by her hair. Almost every article was accompanied by a still taken from the video.The police investigating arrested both Rice and Palmer.

This is the reality of domestic violence: a victim is held as responsible as the perpetrator even when the victim is knocked unconscious.  People are blithely claiming shock and surprise about a violent altercation in which all the details were made public months ago. What is the difference between watching a video and reading the words “punched unconscious and dragged from a lift by her hair”. Do people genuinely not understand those words or the images that accompanied them that they needed the video to understand the full brutality of the attack?

The Baltimore Ravens certainly seem to claim so since they waited until today to fire Ray Rice. The police and prosecutor certainly didn’t, since Rice just ended up on some domestic violence awareness program. And, the NFL certainly are pretending ignorance since they only suspended Rice for two games. The fact that the NFL had to change their policy on players involved in domestic violence in August because of protests about Rice’s lenient sentence is evidence that claims of little to no knowledge are utter horseshit – although, it’s pretty telling that many of the complaints taken seriously were about players being given longer sentences for drug use than for violence. The NFL’s policy change isn’t so much about their stance on domestic violence than it is on their stance on illegal steroid use.

This is why our specialist refuge services are so very important and must be saved. When even the police arrest women for being a victim of domestic violence, we cannot depend on the system to protect women. We need these safe spaces so that women can live free from domestic violence within a supportive environment with qualified, professional staff who understand the coercive control which is the basis of domestic violence. Giving the contract to run refuges to non-specialised services like housing associations puts the lives of women and children at risk.

We need to do better to protect victims of domestic violence and this needs to start with saving our refuges.:

PETITION

Help us save refuges, save lives

 Our world leading national network of refuges is facing an urgent crisis. Across England, more and more specialist refuges are experiencing massive funding cuts and being closed down. This crisis will cost lives.

SOS women and children turned away

We risk losing this life-saving network of services if we do not act now.

We are calling on the government to Save Our Services by committing to preserving the national network of specialist refuges by exploring a new model of national refuge funding and commissioning.

What is happening to specialist refuges across England?

SOS specialist services

Specialist refuges are services which are designed to meet the needs specifically of women domestic violence survivors and their children. The specialist and woman-only nature of services ensures that women and children feel safe, secure and supported and removes any barriers to them finding a safe place when they are escaping domestic violence. Specialist refuges help women and children escape, cope and rebuild their lives after domestic violence.

Being in a refuge might be the first safe space that children and young people may have had in a long time. Specialist provision for children and young people from refuge staff is vital as it allows them to have their health and educational needs addressed individually. Children and young people can also explore the impact of the abuse they have experienced in an understanding environment, which can minimise long term negative cognitive, behavioural and emotional effects, enabling them to reach their potential. To find out more about what a refuge is like inside take a tour around our Virtual Refuge on The Hideout website.

Our national network of specialist domestic violence refuges is in crisis like never before:

• Between 2010 and 2014 (July) the number of specialist refuge services decreased from 187 to 155.

In England, according to Council of Europe recommendations, there is a shortfall of 1,727 refuge bedspaces (32%).

• In one day in 2013, 155 women and their 103 children were turned away from refuge because they could not be accommodated.

•  48% of 167 domestic violence services in England said that they were running services without funding. Six refuge services were being run without dedicated funding and using up their reserves to keep their services going.

• Between April and July 2014, ten specialist domestic violence services across England lost funding for services they were providing. All but one of these nine services lost their services to a non-specialist service provider.

• Our world leading national network of refuges is facing an urgent crisis. Please help us Save Our Services.

PETITION

#DickheadDetox XVALA for sexual violence

XVALA is apparently an “artist” – in the loosest possible definition of the word who has somehow managed to get himself a show at the Cory Allen Contemporary Art (CACA) in Florida. Personally, I’ve never heard of either of them but that’s because I prefer my artists not to engage in or perpetrate sexual violence.

Now, I’m sure XVALA (whoever or whatever that is) will be having absolute kittens about me suggesting they are engaged in sexual violence but his latest “show” (if you can call it that) is called Fear Google and will feature images of Jennifer Lawrence, stolen from iCloud  in the latest hacker crime, and Scarlett Johansonn, whose images were stolen several years ago. Supposedly showing life size images of women naked, taken without consent, is to demonstrate how people are “used”.

Let’s be perfectly clear here: taking images without consent is a violation of privacy. Stealing images (and not leaking FFS) of women naked or having sex is part of the spectrum of sexual violence. Selling or viewing these stolen images is sexual violence.

XVALA’s use of these images isn’t art. It’s participating and encouraging the sexual assault of women. He has no right to pretend the use of these images is art. He has no right to use these images. The gallery has no right to display these images. This is sexual exploitation.

Every single person who looks at these images is engaged in the sexual assault of the women.

XVALA is on the #DickheadDetox for participating in rape culture and sexual violence.

 

Ceelo Green: Still Fighting to be #1 on the #DickheadDetox

Ceelo Green’s been on the #DickheadDetox for a while now what with his history of violence against women and inability to take responsibility for his own actions.

His latest foray into proving he’s a violent asshole involves the following tweets:

ceelo-green CeeLo-Green-tweets

I can’t say anything new from what I’ve said before about Green’s perpetuation and perpetration of rape culture but I love the following graphic which I first saw via Ultraviolet

BwrVZeGCIAEtuGe

Joseph Gordon-Levitt and the “can men be feminists debate”

joseph-gordon-levitt-hot-guy-friday-5

Joseph Gordon-Levitt, actor much loved by the hipster generation, has come out as a feminist:

Coming out against the label? Wow. I guess I’m not aware of that. What that means to me is that you don’t let your gender define who you are—you can be who you want to be, whether you’re a man, a woman, a boy, a girl, whatever. However you want to define yourself, you can do that and should be able to do that, and no category ever really describes a person because every person is unique. That, to me, is what “feminism” means. So yes, I’d absolutely call myself a feminist. And if you look at history, women are an oppressed category of people. There’s a long, long history of women suffering abuse, injustice, and not having the same opportunities as men, and I think that’s been very detrimental to the human race as a whole. I’m a believer that if everyone has a fair chance to be what they want to be and do what they want to do, it’s better for everyone. It benefits society as a whole.

in response to this question:

I read that you consider yourself a “male feminist,” and you credit your parents who are educators and really taught you about the history of feminism. But nowadays, you have a lot of young stars coming out against being labeled a feminist.

Now, I generally grit my teeth when men label themselves feminist anyways but I’m incredibly suspect of the way in which this question was labelled. After all, the media has been saturated with stories about women like Katy Perry, Madonna and Taylor Swift refusing the label feminist because it’s sounds mean to men (or some other equally silly excuse). There’s a very clear “look at those silly women who don’t want to be equal to men” without even pretending to look at how women, especially those in the media, are punished for calling themselves feminist. Frankly, in Taylor Swift’s position, I’d be very hesitant to label myself a feminist for fear of the increase in death and rape threats.

Many women in the public (and private) spheres have male stalkers. Being apolitical is a way of decreasing the abuse – of attempting to limit the number of abusive men targeting them. This doesn’t make them non-feminists, nor does it imply they are stupid. For many women, it is simply one way of trying to survive in a capitalist-patriarchy which hates us. We use the word equalist or, in a completely ahistorical and factually inaccurate way, humanist to attempt to negate male violence. Women live every day with the knowledge of male violence and their behaviour reflects this knowledge.

We can argue till the cows come home about whether or not Beyonce is a feminist (and since she labels herself one, the no side might want to engage with the womanist critique of feminist theory and how it alienates and elides Black  women). But, let’s be totally honest here: it is much easier for Joseph Gordon-Levitt to use the label feminist than it is for Beyonce or Katy Perry. He’s receiving nothing but good press for recognizing that women are human too. Granted, his definition has confused biological sex with gender, he does at least seem to understand that women have been oppressed throughout history, but Gordon-Levitt’s feminism isn’t about the liberation of women: it’s about gender identity and helping men. Feminism will liberate men from the capitalist-patriarchy’s construct of masculinity which is incredibly toxic, but it is women that will benefit more from feminism which is why it’s easier for a man to assume the label than a woman. A rich, young, white man like Joseph Gordon-Levitt has nothing to lose by calling himself a feminist. Katy Perry, on the other hand, would receive ridicule and abuse.

Yet, it isn’t just whether or not men can be feminists which bother me with this news story (and, for the record, I’m on the “men can be feminist allies” side of that debate), but rather what Gordon-Lovett actually believes feminism to be. His definition is that of Barney The Purple Dinosaur with his message of love and acceptable. It doesn’t recognize the multiple oppressions that women face. Feminism isn’t just about accepting people for who they are: it’s about ending rape, domestic violence, fatal male violence, and recognizing that women are harmed daily by the men who are supposed to love them. Feminism isn’t just about equal pay in law but equal pay in practise; the recognition that the economy would fail without women’s unpaid labour in child-rearing; that marriage and child custody arrangements are still predicated on men’s ownership of women’s bodies and (re)productive layout. Feminism is predicated on the notion that women are oppressed as a class – identity politics will not eradicate this.

I am equally suspect of any man who labels themselves a feminist whilst having form for suggesting that pretty women can’t be funny at the press conference for the film Looper. This is how Jezebel wrote up the incident:

What was it like to work with costar Emily Blunt? Here was his answer:

“She’s funny … and let’s face it, most pretty girls aren’t funny.”

 Apparently, Gordon-Levitt’s words came out wrong:

“I’m actually glad you asked me about that, because I was embarrassed,” he said. “Sometimes the words come out really wrong, and sometimes the words come out really wrong in front of thousands of people. I do apologize.”

The 31-year-old went on to say that he was trying to “get at” the fact that “in our culture, girls do tend to get pigeonholed…and I was trying and failing to pay [Blunt] a compliment about the fact that she really succeeded in avoiding those traps and not getting pigeonholed, and even though she’s a very good looking young women she is so funny and plays such a badass and a strong woman in Looper.”

I have dyspraxia and fibromyalgia. I’m the Queen of Getting My Words Wrong (as anyone familiar with this blog can attest too), but, the idea that pretty women can’t be funny is a stereotype for a reason: because men genuinely believe that women who pass the patriarchal fuckability test have no other value. It is possible Gordon-Levitt’s words came out wrong but it is far more likely that he believed what he was saying and only apologized because of the subsequent media storm.

Josephy Gordon-Levitt could truly understand the political theory of feminism or he could just be taking the label because he knows that he would get mega press for it. Either way, he will not be punished for taking the label as many young women are. And, either way, he’s still got a million more opportunities than the vast majority of women across the world. He’s words mean nothing unless he stands up and starts campaigning for women.

#DickheadDetox: This Dude Just For Existing:

I came across this particularly unpleasant example of a white, privately-educated fucknugget whilst he was making dismissive comments about domestic violence. This dude is precisely why we need real sexual health education in schools, which require mandatory teaching on domestic and sexual violence taught by an appropriately trained individual . Also, his parents should ask for a refund on their private school education funds because this dude’s a total fucking asshole with the intellectual understanding of a hamster with late stage rabies.

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